Sunday, March 1
The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, and I obviously have a problem with letting things go.
I can't let go of not having control over certain aspects of my life.
I can't be at peace with not being the writer of my own destiny
Which is a terrible shame, because I know better. See, the World feeds this lie to us all over and over again:"you are in control of your own destiny." But that might as well be a line from a fairy-tale for all the truth it holds. Rain falls when it will and if you are outside, you will get wet. The Bible says,"The Lord has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble" (Proverbs 16:4). And all the plans I wrote and re-wrote? "Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand" (Proverbs 19:21).
So, what am I to do? All the craziness, all the bad, all the woe that I wish I could exude out of my life by sheer will power is beyond my control. Life has been ordained to carry on as it will. The story has already been written, and I'm just playing it out. This is worry sets in.
What if I don't like this story? What if my role is one of helplessness and plight? It is easy to fall into a pattern of panic, chasing desperately after a better plot line. But that is when Romans 8:28 comes to mind, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."
Ultimately, things are going to work out for good. Sure my plans might be bust, but there are greater plans in store for me. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." Everything is going to be alright.